30 before 30

imagesThis year I turned 28. Sure, in the developed world of Botox and Viagra, 28 is considered young. Back here in the old country, my face is already sagging and I should be in bed by 9pm – or else I’ll turn into a harlot werewolf. I kid.

In reality, I’m straddling two worlds, begging to be taken in as a full fledged member by one or the other – whichever will have me first.  In my latest attempt to court my youth, I decided to reach out to young people in a small city in Uttar Pradesh. Needless to say, I now feel old – very, very old.

So old, in fact, that after two glasses of red wine I’m thinking of how my days to 30 are numbered and few. Before all of my enthusiasm fades and I take to watching old Hitchcock movies while drinking single malts, here’s my list of 30 things I want to do before I’m 30.  I solicit my friends, family & strangers to help me make my dreams come true (not in a Robert DeNiro in Great Expectations kinda way, thank you) in the next 23 months. While this list may seem extreme, it’s only because the life I’ve lived ’til now has been effin’ amazing. #realtoppatop #shouldershrug

In no particular order…

1- Go to Trinidad & Tobago Carnival

2- Sponsor a child’s education

3- Go to Durban, South Africa Durban

 

 

 

 

4- Publish a text

5- Own a safe deposit box

6- Fly a plane

Aschobi Designs

7- Wear a designer ball gown

 

 

 

 

8- Own a business

9- Attend my best friend’s wedding

10- See my eldest godson go to college

11- See my youngest godson smile from ear to ear

12- Pay off all my credit card debt

13- Buy another house

14- See Igacu FallsIgacu Falls

 

 

 

 

 

15- Curate an art show

16- Collect an oral history of my family

17- Drive cross country (USA)

18- Actually learn more about African-American history #dontjudgeme

19- Give a guest lecture at a university

20- Get a grill Hycide

 

 

 

21- Get another tattoo

22- Go on a spiritual retreat/pilgrimage

23- Visit Macon, Alabama

24- Help an Indian girl to get out of poverty

25- Help a Cape Verdean girl to get out of poverty

26- Help a Brazilian girl to get out of poverty

27- Help a Newark girl to get out of poverty Newark

 

 

 

28- Go on a girls trip with my mom

29- Buy a collector’s edition purse #dontjudgeme

30- Be genuinely happy

Oh, Delhi you slay me!

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Well the time has come to leave India; all I can say is, “Oh, Delhi you slay me.” I’m not sure what it is about India, but it is surely a special place. While I racked my brain about what to write it was clear that I wouldn’t be able to fully explain my feelings on all the events of this “vacation.” It is often said that the journey is equally important as the destination. So, lets begin with the journey from Indira Gandhi International airport. We were pulled over in our taxi by a motorcycle cop with no siren and no tickets, and eventually let go without any penalty. All the while I’m thinking, “this is a pure waste of time.” Apparently this is the case with many things here. So before I continue here’s my disclaimer: I cannot be held responsible for any confusion as a result of the lack of order in this publication. It is an accurate reflection of this trip.

Indian culture is the product of several religions, languages, and power shifts over centuries. And there’s finally English colonization. As a historian, I would love to say this explains the huge socio-economic gap that exists here, but I truly don’t know. The poverty I’ve seen here exponentially outshines the best “Feed the Children” infomercial. There are literally people who sleep on the ground feet away from Lamborghinis and Bentleys.  I assume this is why everything here has a price. Free parking is under the control of self-proclaimed ‘attendants,’ who will flatten your tires if you don’t pay 10 rupees (2 cents). At every historical sight there was some guy wanting his cut. The City Palace in Jaipur boasts a bathroom guy, parking fellow, and even a perfect spot for picture men who double as guides. My sister says that’s why it takes so long to get things done, because there are so many people who need a piece of the action. I’m not sure what it is, but when every job is done with primitive technology what can you expect? Five guys painted lines on the street, which are clearly just a suggestion to the worst drivers in the world (congratulations New Yorkers). Not everything about India and Delhi is bad, but it just takes a bit of patience to see past it.

While here I had the pleasure of dining with a diplomat and his wife in a home that had more servants than I have immediate family members. Any who at this dinner it was clear that Delhi was like an onion and I would only understand it if I peeled back the layers. Similar to eating the street food here, I would have to be a native or extremely bold to try it. Let’s assume I was the latter.

So with my backpack, father and horn happy driver I hit the streets. Vasant Vihar (my area of residence) was littered with small embassies. Most only having one guard in a small booth, which surprised me. In a walk through old Delhi there were tombs that remained from the beginning of Delhi’s existence. It came as a shock that these beautiful structures were only accessible by walking through a maze of side streets and tight back alleys that played host to butchers, barbershops, bakeries, and even a goat with a coat (see above). There were no short cuts taken in the rewiring of streetlights to provide energy to this prehistoric part of town either. Survival is contingent upon family unity. While family does not always constitute shared blood, the love is no different.

So I leave India with my sense of family bonds renewed and my appreciation for the simple things exponentially multiplied. I’ve seen enough palaces and forts to last a lifetime with pictures to prove it. I’ve seen the world’s biggest clock and the world’s biggest silver jar (seriously). My nights have consisted of movies and television shows about old English people with my dear sister and father. My days were filled with walks around Vasant Vihar taking pictures of all the Embassies I could find. I’ve seen a woman balancing 5 pots on her head and dancing to the music of her seemingly mentally ill sons. My vacation has shown me crazy men who beg for money exist all around the globe. With all that said I wouldn’t move India to the top of my vacation list, but I am grateful for the new friends made and time well spent.

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This week’s guest blogger is Ameer Allen. Born and raised in Newark, NJ, he is a twenty-three year old Lincoln University grad, history buff, and diehard Cowboys fan.

(He’s also my hilariously funny big little brother.)